1. I don’t know what I would do if my daughter died!
Yes you do, you would cry for months. You would be devastated. Your world would be crushed. You just don’t want to imagine what it would be like. Because it’s terrible.
2. I can’t imagine what you are going through!
Actually, unfortunately, you can imagine it.
It is a very sad and tragic event, so your brain wants to protect itself, and try not to imagine what I am going through.
3. If my child died, I would kill myself!
Wow! So are you saying that I should end it? End my suffering and just walk off of a cliff? Give up on life?Maybe next time, if you have that thought, keep it to yourself.
4. I am surprised that you and your husband aren’t in an institution!
Okay, um, how do I respond to that?? Should I feel grateful that I’m not in an institution? Or should I worry that one day I will be institutionalized? Yes my “story” seems tragic, or it is tragic, but humans do have resiliency. I work on my grief and triggers and healing every day.
5. Well, we all knew that this would happen.
Did we though?
Yes, it’s true that each of us will die eventually. That is the cycle of life and death.
However, when you are a witness to your friends or family when their loved one passes away, do you think that it helpful to hear “well we all knew he would die eventually”.
And who is this “we all”?
